Beginning

Darkly Lit

11-13-16

It was bright between the clouds and coldwindy but I went anyhow
gleaning stones again.

Community

I'm thinking about community 

what it means to be part of one

how one defines their own 

I read this 

http://www.vox.com/first-person/2016/11/17/13642864/trump-election-empathy-baratunde-thurston

its a good read. it asks questions and indicates directions to focus on. 

Spiral

"We study history. Those of us who glamorize the great old days without acknowledging on whose backs that greatness was achieved do a disservice to the present and the future. And for those of us fighting for justice, there are several playbooks and source code repositories left behind by abolitionists, trade unionists, feminists, artists, prisoners, and more. History is not a circle, but more probably a spiral, in which we revisit similar but not exact coordinates from the past. We should revisit that past and prepare for the troubling times ahead."

 Baratunde Thurston 

What is Next

what IS next
I went to my first ever political meeting on Saturday.
I have some big changes approaching in the near future.
Most are not of my choosing.
Tonight I see a way forward.
I feel brave

Entangled

I have been entangled in recent events for months now
since Tuesday I have been sick, raging, sad, disappointed, sleepless and bleak.
A kind of grim hurricane
So much was lost. It hurts.
I think its hooks are out for the moment and I'm trying not to get dragged back in
Today was a little better and I'm trying to choose the things that put me back into myself again.
I sent off a volunteer form to the Nature Conservancy. I find the woods to be healing to my spirit.
I think I will go to one of the local preserves on Sunday
Pride and Prejudice helped last night and so did the second vol of the Neapolitan Series
I hope to sleep tonight so now I will go and do some yoga
Deep Breaths

long ago deserts

Distance has no meaning in the desert-not if the rider knows the way of things, the points of similarity between this and that, the places where the sky can fold.
                                                                                                          -seanan mcguire
                                                                                                                     In the Desert Like a Bone

New Mexico

I like the idea of a sky folding...

Fanciful

I'm at my best when I am
Fanciful

I'm at my best when I go
Explore

exploring new worlds

making time to make stuff.
Trying out some new techniques, new ideas...
while I explored
I found the full moon on the dye rack today!

Making time for Medicine

                                             

                                                                           

"i come away with that thought, how making, known or unknown, makes the antidotes...." ~ grace

I've been spending some time Making lately, Making time to Make stuff.
expanding my vocabulary,
exploring and experimenting, as I do...
a different form of medicine
good for what ails me

Fragments

remaining bits

We had a Gypsy moth attack this year. The caterpillars ate the trees down to bare twigs by mid June.
Preferring the pines and oaks, they got to the maples last, leaving bits of the leaves behind.
My little Japanese maple is making the most of its shreds of finery.  

I seem to be trying to go in forty different directions at once. I never am sure of where to start, everything seems equally important. There are some changes looming ahead and I want to meet them on my terms. I just wish I had a better description of what those terms are. Its hard to trust that this will sort itself out if I can just trust the process of sorting it out.

Easing back in.

early autumn  grape leaf

Depression is a hell of a thing

spider on button bush

I don't know how other people experience it,
I withdraw, I medicate, I lose touch.

fungus and lichen, oak stump

I lose people, sometimes forever...  
and that is sad too.

 eastward long view

It's not relaxed, just anxiety, endless and paralyzing.

last of the lilies

It rises like a wave, and I tread water until it recedes.
Sometimes that can take years.

wild aster in the poison ivy

I learn how to treat it, I medicate it, I get some help (I'm fortunate)

wild aster

Eventually I start to wade out.
Sometimes that can take years too.

Still Thinking

Nest 20

 Nesting has been with me for a long time now, 3 or 4 years at least. Sometimes it has shown up as art but it has also been a large part of my activities. I find myself sorting all the strands of my life, trying to find the shape of it. What do I want it to be?

Nest 21

Looking again at Tribes and Icons

more sorting 

trying to understand their stories, who they are 

Nest sketches

My attention has been elsewhere
I'm still focused inward
still thinking about nests
sketching them out with what I find at hand

Nest 13

Nest 14

Nest 15

Nest 16

Nest 17

Nest 18

Nest 19