Tuesday, April 20, 2010

More Steps

Its funny how recognizing that I'm experiencing some new dynamics in other areas of my life, and realizing that its understandable that it may be difficult to maintain a focus on artwork at the moment made the idea of actually doing something just a little easier tonight. I relaxed and followed an idle thought or two. No pressure, just a few minutes of messing around.
I noticed something else tonight, another aspect of all or nothing thinking...
It gets difficult to start again sometimes because I think
"oh no! I haven't done anything for awhile... the next thing I do better be really good just to make up for lost time"
Thinking that of course sort of ratchets up the pressure to perform, which makes it just a little harder to start
Then if I don't have all the energy necessary to get started...
I repeat the whole process again and maybe again, each time ratcheting the pressure up just little more.
Mmmmm... self defeating?

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